How to Bake Without Blowing Stuff Up

Posted: April 19, 2013 in I am so awesome, Life, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

I’m not a baker. Y’all probably make tiramisu and crepes and stuff every other day, but me? Nope.

Therefore, when I set out to make cream puffs yesterday, I was quite apprehensive. I’m wonderful at baking brownies from the mix, but geez, cream puffs are HARDCORE.

Here are the humble beginnings:

Guess what, guys? I hate dealing with boiling water. Or actually anything involving a stove top. I survived, though. Somehow.

After I got that whipped up, I plopped the dough onto a baking sheet and mixed a little glaze thingy that I got to brush over the dough with a pastry brush! A pastry brush, people. This is real stuff here.

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It was so fun.

After covering the dough pieces completely, I ended up with this:

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They look kind of gross, don’t they? (The dough didn’t taste very good, either, but that was to be expected. So I was told.)

Then…disaster struck.

I was going about my merry way, waiting for the oven to preheat, and then there’s this big POP sound, emanating from the oven. Mom opens the door to investigate, and we are greeted with the sight of a flaming oven heating element. You know, the thing that looks like a big black coil at the bottom of the oven? The thing that heats up and makes the oven an oven? Half of it was all lit up orange, and the other half was black. After further investigation, we Mom determined that half of the heating element had broken. How does that even happen? And more importantly, would the cream puffs that I was so laboriously laboring over go to waste?

No. They wouldn’t. Apparently there was enough heat retained in the functioning half of the heating element that the cream puffs could still bake. Phew. (It was a little anticlimactic, though.)

So I stuck the pan into the oven, and…waited.

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It was agony. Agony! Far more painful than yours. (Name that quote, and I shall give you a virtual bag of Starbursts.)

Obviously, I got over my agony, because I forgot to take pictures when the puffs came out of the oven. Oops.

I decided not to make the cream yesterday. I’m not quite sure why. But I made it today. The recipe involves beating up a bit of heavy whipping cream, and to be truthful, I was terrified. See, this one time, Mom was beating heavy whipping cream and she accidentally beat it for too long. We thought it would still taste all right, but in reality, it was the most awful thing I’ve ever, ever, ever eaten. I almost puked MOVING ON. This time, it turned out. See for yourselves:

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Don’t you wish you could eat it? *evil cackle*

Unfortunately, I had forgotten to put the puff part of the cream puffs onto a wire rack to cool yesterday. So they ended up looking like this:

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So, not completely appetizing. But they looked a million times better once I filled one with cream and ate a delicious lunch snack.

After eating it (and enjoying every minute of it), I decided that maybe baking isn’t so bad after all. I’m still not a culinary genius (I’m not sure if that’s even an actual possibility for me, at any point, anywhere, in my life), but I’m not a crappy baker as I have always feared. Hallelujah.

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Comments
  1. Ivy says:

    The quote? FROM “INTO THE WOODS!” =) Now, where are my virtual Starbursts?

  2. Hamlette says:

    I love to bake, but I have never attempted cream puffs. You rock!

  3. Erin says:

    Into the Woods! And I didn’t peek at Ivy’s comment! :)

    And those cream puffs look absolutely delicious! *attempts to eat one off the computer screen* *fails*

  4. mydearbakes says:

    Your bake looks amazing! I love it! =D

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